Welcome to the second installment of a possible synonym for “high-deas”. Evolution is a cool and very strange process, and sometimes it can produce organisms that look like a 4th grader’s drawing. Since I spend so much time on the internet, I have compiled a very special list that honors these special children of the universe.
Animals That Trip Me Out
- The Silkie Chicken. A natural for the camera but Where is its face?
- The Hyrax. Think this is a rat? You are wrong. The closest relation to this furry SOBitch is the MANATEE.
- The Meishan Piggie. I am a Pig-person, they are smart, fat, lazy, and like to snuggle. I am not the only one, Paris Hilton and other celebrities started the trend of owning a micro-pig as a fashion accessory. This specific species makes wrinkles look uber fabulous, and I wish that Japanese scientists would make me a tiny one.
- The Angora Rabbit. A personal favorite of mine. Bunnies don’t love people, their cute faces are a lie. The Angora rabbit has solved this problem by hiding over several pounds of fluff. Though you can’t see its face, you know it’s pissed BUT I commend it on its honesty. I still want it. As a pillow.
- The Proboscis Monkey. While possibly the ugliest primate to ever exist, it still looks like it knows the answer to all life’s problems. Or is easily offended.
- The Potoo Bird. Crazy Eyes. That is all.
I just don’t want to know what he is thinking. Or if he has x-ray vision. - Alpaca. The alpaca might not seem as strange as the rest of the animals on this list but the video below clearly shows that they know who we are and are planning the destruction of the human race.
- Gloster’s Canary.
Look at that bowl cut. Name me one person in the world who rocks that hair better than this bird. - Pygmy Seahorse. The smallest seahorse that has ever existed, the pygmy is still very territorial. It protects its millimeter of Coral-branch by moving its little head and headbutting the other pygmy seahorse. I included a photo to show the size comparison.
Yes, that is a thumbnail. 
- The Dugong. Fun fact: These sea cows can eat football field sizes of seagrass in a day. I love manatees more than anything in the world, but I wouldn’t hate having that dugong mouth eat cake off my stomach. Not in a sexual way, but I think it would feel nice. There. I said it.
“Touch Me” - The Giant Sunfish. These guys are huge and rare. They side float on the surface of the ocean to eat plankton. Or tan. I am not the only one in awe of these weirdos: The Boston guy in the video below expresses my exact feelings on the subject.
Thank You and stay tuned for more!
Painfully Average 