36. Hi Thoughts IV

Hey.

We all know what this is even if I can’t legally say it.

So no more sassy intros, just read the weird thoughts I write down when I am “hello” off my ass.

Hello Thoughts IV:

Think of how pregnant the world would be if blowjobs could knock you up? I know not everyone swallows but still, there would be way too many people
I grew up with this Irish toast being said at every family gathering:
1. “May those that love us, love us. And those that don’t love us, May God turn their hearts. And if he doesn’t turn their hearts, May he turn their ankles, so we’ll know them by their limping.”
2. Reading over that, I realize that is pretty fucking dark.
There are around 78 Tarot cards and each specific birthday (with the day, month, year taken into account) is assigned their own tarot card. Guess what mine is? Not even kidding.
On that note, I googled what my name means and this came up:
1. “In Latin the meaning of the name Maureen is: Dark. Irish Meaning: The name Maureen is an Irish baby name. In Irish the meaning of the name Maureen is: Bitter.”
2. Considering how many times I have been in the mental hospital and cut off extended family members, my parents must have been divinely inspired in their name choice. Or they just named me after the other 2 Maureen’s in my over 100 member Irish circus of a family. But they suck too so my point still stands.
3. Upside, if you urban dictionary my name, this comes up

What kind of music is left for future generations? Unless we invent a new instrument, we are already in the age of electronic computer music and Justin Bieber. While the fact that my generation’s musical leaders are people like Kanye West, Carly Rae Jepson, and Katy Perry is depressing enough, what is possibly going to happen to music on the next two generations? Will the contemporaries just be types of computers? Or will Donald trump trigger a nuclear lol-ocaust forcing music to start over from square one?
Do cops have friends that do drugs? Statistically, that has to be possible. Especially if they met before they became cops. And do those friends tell the cops about their drug habits anymore? Do they just stop being friends?
Everything I think or want, is just an illusion given to homo sapiens by evolution
Panda’s poo 40 times a day and are really lazy about sex, which is why they are endangered.
Speaking of Pandas Please Just Click This For a Second:
Think you are having a bad day? The kakapo is a parrot that evolved on an isolated island in New Zealand with no natural predators. The result of which was 1. They can’t fly since they didn’t have to, 2. They are huge and green so camouflage is out, 3. The way they hide when threatened is just to stand still (when has that ever worked except with a T-REX), 4. Since they had no predators, evolution gave them the ability to only mate every 3-5 years to keep their population in check. Oh and mating isn’t a sure thing either, the females are picky as fuck and the males have to loudly sing every night further exposing their position. When the colonists arrived on the island with cats, rats, and other dirty animals, these sassy parrots were FUCKED. Cats aren’t fooled by the freeze frame technique; they just ate our chubby bird to near extinction. Now there are 125 in the wild, all with names. I realize this is our fault and we suck, but maybe they are meant to die. Upside? They can live to 100. Downside? I mean it must suck being the world’s only flightless parrot. I bet they get shit from other birds.
Uncertainty Brings Freedom
Ever met anyone that made you want to say “you talk like a book” but you didn’t because you were too embarrassed?